Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Ayin Tova

The eye is the lamp of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light.  But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness! No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.- Matthew 6

Time is the only currency we truly have. We trade some of it for money, which we trade for food and shelter so that we can spend other time on things more enjoyable. We spend, aptly put, our time. 
These principals caught my eye lately when I confessed to a roommate of mine that I've been lacking spiritually lately. I do not spend enough time in prayer, and I do not spend enough time reading the Bible.  I do God stuff, like go to church and serve. I attend a Mens Bible study where I do what I can to be transparent. It was at that Bible study that I was prompted to investigate my heart.

The other day someone ate my lunch. I'm not talking like, they chowed down on a $1.99 sandwich that I was left in the fridge for a week, no. I'm talking one of those $3.99 premium mac and cheese dinners that are even better than restaurant style mac and cheese. Now, I had had some tension with this person before, and this set me further on edge. They ate MY lunch.  This injustice was the subject of a lot of my thoughts until it's resolution, a week later. Yeah, a week later it was dealt with. that was a lot of time, a lot of life, that I spent on being upset over something stupid. I was hung up on it. My eye was not full of light. My heart was not where it should be.

At that Mens group Bible study the men said that they'd pray for the whole situation. When they said they'd pray for "the situation" what I am sure they were saying was " we pray that everything works out for peace" but what I heard was "we pray that you pull your head out of your butt".  That caused me to take a step backward.

That is when this passage came to mind:

“For this reason the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves.  When he had begun to settle them, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him.  But since he did not have the means to repay, his lord commanded him to be sold, along with his wife and children and all that he had, and repayment to be made. So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, ‘Have patience with me and I will repay you everything.’ And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt. But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii; and he seized him and began to choke him, saying, ‘Pay back what you owe.’ So his fellow slave fell to the ground and began to plead with him, saying, ‘Have patience with me and I will repay you.’  But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should pay back what was owed.  So when his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their lord all that had happened.  Then summoning him, his lord *said to him, ‘You wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me.  Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave, in the same way that I had mercy on you?’- Matthew 18


Anger and gratitude cannot occupy the same space at the same time. Had I had more of a discipline focusing on the gratitude that I have for God's mercy and patience and gracious giving in abundance, I probably wouldn't have been so indignant about $3.99.  How much of my life looks dim because of a darkness in my eye? How much of the world looks bleak, not out of reality but out of our perception.

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.- Philippians 4


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